Recovering

You would think by now I could recover from drama and trauma quicker. I have been on the road to recovery from depression for the last 5 years. I have learned so much in self help. I know problems are temporary. I know I am a soul in a body here to learn, share and grow in knowledge. But I am amazed how one incident can put you back to the point of wishing this life was over. It should all be irrelevant.  Nothing should be that bad. But some times you loose complete control of  your ego mind. You forget or are not strong enough to say stop. This it not that big of an issue. It can be solved. You just get lost in your own mind. You  cry and anger easy. You feel fear that can lead to panic or anxiety. 
But it ultimately leads to a choice. Do I stay broken or do I pick myself up and get back on the road to freedom to enjoy this life. To savor a moment is a blessing. To share this moment with some one you love is truly a gift. It is hard to put away negative thoughts. It is like a war in your mind. This war leaves you a victim if you do not JUST SAY STOP! You need to fight hard with positive thoughts. Some times you are too week. You get to the point of hopelessness. You wonder why. Why me. But at that point. You do not realize it is not as bad, as you have allowed your mind to convince you it is.  
I know I should just take a deep breath. and start telling my self I am strong, I can conquer any thing.